Barcelona, Spain

It's pronounced barth al own a and it is beautiful and that is where we are now. I can actually speak some of the language and the city is incredibly beautiful.  We flew from Lisboa which is literally covered in spray paint graffiti to Midrid  then to Barcelona.  I'll talk more about Barcelona tomorrow, but for now let's say that Barcelona is heads and shoulders (whatever that means) above Lisboa with this Big Ole Dumb Southern Boy.

Dude, airports in Spain are screwy. When we flew into Santiago de Compostela a couple weeks ago, the airline had two luggage claim areas for the same flight. Of course they only published one of the areas and after we awaited forever then decided to ask the conveyor belt dude where the Big Ole Dumb Gringo and the The  Bleach Blond Gringo's  bags were they told us they were over the river and through the woods to a place behind a door that said some craziness on it and with folks with guns inside. It turns out that was the international baggage area. You would think they would tell the Gringos on the Big Ole TVs huh? Noooooooooo. Well anyway today in Barcelona we tried to find our bags and found a baggage claim TV that said Belt 00. Well we walked into the room and wham goes the doors behind us locking us out of the stupid main baggage claim area. The stupid TV said Belt 00 but nooooooooo that was for somebody else. So we figured out the stupid TV was wrong and had to walk most of the way through the airport and walk backwards through security checkpoints that I thought was surely going to land us in Spanish prison. It turns out the stupid TV was wrong. But I try to look on the bright side of most situations. So if you want to walk through Barcelona's stupid airport through stupid security checkpoints backwards and not land in Spain's stupid prison then just ask me. Good ahead ask me. I'm not sore at all. Go ahead and ask me. Oh so you don't want to know. Good.

So after we got our stupid bags we got into a cab to go to the hotel. The driver gets in and starts the stupid meter at 8.40 euros which is like $11.40. What is the Sam Hill was the idjit doing? It seems the airport charges 4.20 euros per person for the convenience of catching a cab. Then the idjit charges us 2 euros to put our bags in.  The stupid short cab ride was 32 euros which is like $45. I wanted to drop kick me some idjits today. But I didn't because I would have pushed my luck since I didn't go to the stupid Spanish prison to get our stupid bags. If I had drop kicked that stupid cabbie through his stupid goal posts of life then I might have pushed my stupid luck to the point where somebody would have written a future book about Big Ole Dumb Southern Gringos in Stupid Spanish prison, and that ain't gonna happen Yall.  Idjits

We are in the Novotel Hotel on the 16th floor. Holy guacamole. The stupid birds don't fly this high. If  I squint I can see Albuquerque, New Mexico. They speak Spanish in Albuquerque you know, that's why I can see it from Spain. I really hate to point out the obvious but someone has to do it.

We took the subway to someplace Deb suggested and had dinner. The  dinner  was at a tapas restaurant in the touristy part of town. Anyway, tapas means roughly translated in Big Ole Dumb Southern Boy Spanish as little plates. Yeah it was little plates with little food but with a huge, huge price. I finally got tired and threw my stupid wallet at them and told them to get me something to eat other than a green bean (one) sauteed in fusioned extra virgin olive oil and garlic in a earthen pot that cost $10.  I kid you not. These were little plates with very little food that cost an arm and a leg. Dang, a Southern Boy can't get a break in this town.

So, it is bedtime in Big Ole Dumb Southern Boy Land.  Yall have a good day. Tomorrow we start touring Barcelona and I'm sure I'll have a few stories to share

ABye for now.